Feast of the Holy Family 2025

  Today we celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family. The Sunday between Christmas and New Year’s every year is dedicated to the Holy Family of Nazareth. Our Lord Jesus Christ was born in a stable in Bethlehem, and was placed in a manger because there was no room in the inn. Jesus was born into the humblest of situations, the Son of God was born in humility and born in poverty. And yet, he was born into a family, born in love to a loving mother and a loving father. We honor this family of humility and love, this family of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

I grew up being part of the final generation whose custom it was to put the initials of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph at the top of our homework papers at school, “JMJ.” It was when I was in the second grade that we began to learn cursive writing, and we were taught to write, in giant looping cursive letters, these three initials at the top of the first page of every assignment. We did this as a prayer to invoke the Holy Family to guide our minds, our hearts, and our hands, so that we might do our very best with each task that we were assigned.

Perhaps it is coincidental, but perhaps it is related, that around the same time that we left off invoking the Holy Family on our homework the institution of  the human family began to suffer a growing disrespect in our culture. The human family had been the basic unit of society since the time of Adam and Eve, and suddenly, as many traditional cultural establishments were being questioned, the family unit also came under question.

While many families, especially faithful church-going families of all faiths, continued to grow in wisdom, age, and grace, many families began to suffer an identity crisis. Around this time, the number of broken families began to increase, and it became difficult to point to any one specific cause. The Catholic Church noticed the trend, or rather, the Catholic Church actually predicted this trend, as certain values began to be abandoned.

As part of this trend, the Church recognized that it takes more and more concentrated effort for couples to raise healthy, holy families; St. Pope Paul the sixth even stated that sometimes holy marriages and holy families can be achieved only by heroic effort. However, this does not mean that heroic effort is the same as an impossible effort. If we are trying to achieve holy marriages and holy families on the strength of our own merits, then we are setting ourselves up for failure. In order to develop holy marriages and holy families, a supernatural effort is necessary. What this means is that we cannot do this relying only upon human power, we must draw on the power that only God can supply. Archbishop Fulton Sheen used to say that successful marriages require three persons, not two. He said a successful marriage is a partnership of three: the man, the woman, and God at the center. Our Lord raised Matrimony to be a Sacrament precisely for this reason: because, without the grace of God, it is impossible to have a holy marriage and impossible to raise a holy family.

I have heard some people say how noble it is that wolves mate for life.  I have heard it said how noble that bald eagles and swans mate for life. It might be a little less noble, but still quite noble, that the gibbon, the seahorse, and even the lowly prairie vole, all mate for life! But when the Church insists that humans are to commit to marriage for life, we hear that it is nearly impossible, and that it is unrealistic to ask our young people to make a life commitment when they do not yet have the experience to commit like this. 

Sacramental marriage has three traits, and none of the three traits can be overlooked or eliminated. Marriage is exclusive; marriage is indissoluble, and marriage is fruitful. Marriage is exclusive, which means it is for the relationship of one man and one woman only. They promise to love and honor each other exclusively. Marriage is indissoluble, which means the marriage covenant lasts for life. There is no other way to break or dissolve the marriage covenant. And marriage is fruitful, which means marriage is intended for the begetting and raising of children. Sacramental marriages must be open to God’s gift of children.

Of course, when the Church states that these three characteristics must exist for a sacramental marriage, there is always the danger that our young people will just say “forget it,” and that they will go and get married in a barn or on a beach somewhere. But on the other hand, there is a danger of lowering the bar, so to speak, so that eventually there is no bar at all. St. Pope John Paul the second said, “Many families are living in fidelity to those values that constitute the foundation of the institution of the family. Others” he continues, “have become uncertain and bewildered over their role or even doubtful and almost unaware of the ultimate meaning and truth of conjugal and family life.”

One remedy, to be sure, is strong, faithful, happy families, which raise children who understand the role and purpose of marriage, and who grow to marry and produce strong, faithful, happy families. Families such as these provide a positive witness to their children, to their relatives, to their acquaintances, and also provide a positive witness to the community and society in general. God gives us His grace through the Sacraments so that we might choose to do the right thing. In particular, God gives couples His grace in the Sacrament of Matrimony. We need to remind ourselves that Matrimony is the only Sacrament that is not conferred by the priest. The ministers of the Sacrament of Matrimony are the couple themselves! By their sacred vows they confer this Sacrament upon each other, with Christ at their center. The Sacrament of Matrimony is so sacred, that it is a reflection of the love of Christ our Savior; Christ the bridegroom takes the ‘Church as his bride; this is the model for every Christian marriage. 

Perhaps we should once again put the initials of Jesus, Mary and Joseph at the top of our papers. But at the very least, we should return to invoking the Holy Family to guide us in our efforts, we should return to invoking the Holy Family to guide us in our lives. But most of all, we should return to invoking the Holy Family to guide us in our families. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, bless our families; Jesus, Mary and Joseph, help us to grow into happy, holy families. Bless our families, make them strong. Make our families to be shining examples to the secular world. Make our families to be examples that others will strive to imitate, make our families to be examples that our children will be eager to have for themselves. And make our families strong and holy that the family, this beautiful unit of love and life and holiness will continue down through the future generations. Amen.